Tag: inner stillness

The Field

© 2012 Anne S. Katzeff / Artist
© 2012 Anne S. Katzeff / Artist
“Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing
and right-doing, there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.”—Rumi

This is one of my favorite Rumi quotes, and lately I’ve been thinking it would be the perfect engraved quotation to appear at the entrance to all government buildings in Washington, D.C.—or in all government buildings everywhere, throughout the world. Better yet, abolish the buildings and just meet in the fields! Something needs to change, that’s for sure. Entrenched attitudes and political posturing are part of the old paradigm of separation and irreconcilable differences. The new paradigm, which we are living into day by day, calls for these to dissolve and make way for open hearts and open minds. And for listening instead of nonstop talking.

Politicians are not the only ones caught in this trap. When people identify heavily with their personalities, they frequently find themselves stubbornly clinging to being right and finding others wrong. Beneath the personality and egoic roles, however, lives the individual spirit or soul who sees commonality and connection instead of “otherness.” Here is found the oneness and peace we all seek. My soul doesn’t care if my personality is irritated by someone else’s beliefs or behavior. My soul doesn’t care if my ego feels wronged by another person’s opinion of me. My soul is just witnessing all of my life experiences, without comment, without attitude. In that place of pure spacious being within, there are no opposing sides—all is one.

If we could pause, breathe deeply, and drop into that space periodically throughout the day, our lives would flow with greater ease, and our relationships would become more flexible. To live from an open heart and a peaceful spirit is to find true happiness in each moment—and common ground for collective decision making in our communities and in the world at large. Give up right; give up wrong. Consider the possibility that there really is a field out there where we can meet and learn from our differences instead of fight over them.

In Lynne McTaggart’s book The Field, she writes of the space within and between everything on Earth and in outer space, which scientists have heretofore labeled “dead.” McTaggart makes a convincing case that this space is alive with energy and vibration, the very basis of the universe. This is ancient knowledge within the realm of spiritual masters, and today many quantum physicists also agree that a “unified field” of intelligence or infinite consciousness does indeed exist, and we are part of it. If I am not mistaken, Rumi’s field and McTaggart’s field are one and the same. The silent space of spirit within is connected to the space between all forms on Earth and in the cosmos. The energy within and between vibrates a web of light that is pure oneness. When we consciously “step into” that rainbow field of light, hardened conflicts soften, and you and I recognize each other as we.

Infinity

“The infinite nature of your being exists beyond name and form. Any definition that you place on infinity becomes a limitation.”—Panache Desai

During my week on retreat in Costa Rica with Panache Desai (see last blog post “The Silence Within”), transformation occurred at many levels. Yes, it was about accessing the silence within each of us, but it was also about living from that place of spaciousness and calm no matter what the circumstances in our lives are. For me, it was also about facing a lifelong fear of infinity/eternity.

Panache always tells us that we are infinite beings with infinite potential, that we are expanding infinitely, part of a universe that is also expanding infinitely. It’s amazing how often he uses the word infinite! And I love what he says, while at the same time being terrified of infinity—how cosmically ironic is that? Clearly, synchronicity led me to this human being, this avatar who embodies a Divine presence, for a reason. So I decided that this week would be a good time to take a look at that fear of infinity so deeply embedded in me. I signed up for one of the hour-long personal breakthrough sessions that he offered mid-week.

On the morning of my appointment, I walked to the meeting room, and Jan, Panache’s wife, who works with him, met me at the door. She sat to my right, holding a calm, supportive space, and Panache sat across from me, eyes half-closed, clearly in a deep meditative state. He told me that all layers of fear were going to be peeled away first. We then sat in silence, and I began to cry as I felt the inner shredding occur. After several minutes, I told him that the core fear for me was infinity/eternity. He asked what I was afraid of, and I said I couldn’t really say, just that I had had a terror of “the world going on forever and ever” since early childhood. He said, “Okay, we’re going to go there, experience it.”

Initially, I felt overwhelming pain and sorrow, tears streaming down my face, as I released a lifetime of struggling to avoid that powerful terror. He told me that it was moving up and out my crown chakra, and he saw it as a fear of embodying my own infinite power as a soul on Earth. The next step was to dissolve the density of old stories, beliefs, experiences, emotions, and separation. I experienced all sorts of shifting energy inside: heat rushes, heaviness, lightness, shakiness, brain expanding. Then, slowly, all emotion drained away, and I felt…empty…my body insubstantial. And along with the emptiness was a stillness, calm, peace…almost a comforting energy. When I described this to Panache, he said, “That’s infinity. It’s inside you. It’s who you are.” The final step was to anchor this within me. I could feel my whole system being recalibrated as my body was rebooted “from self-defense to relaxation.”

Afterward, as I walked slowly back to my room, instead of my usual desire to write in my journal after an experience, I only felt a wish to lie down and rest in the inner peace. My personality-self seemed very distant. I rested and slept a bit and then just remained in silence for the afternoon. At dinner, even as I took part in group conversations, there was still a core of silence within me.

Flying home and returning to my daily life, I watched myself not reacting to things that might have triggered a judgment or fear before. There seemed to be a neutral allowing, something like “witness consciousness,” emanating from that still space inside. As the days and weeks passed, I would sometimes be swept up in the emotions and experiences of my life, but if I took time to breathe deeply and focus on “allowing and receiving,” that feeling of infinite peace at my center was restored. I could feel the emotions and let them pass through me, knowing it was just part of being human. And, for the first time ever, I was able to look forward to the rest of my life and beyond, into infinity, and feel excitement undiluted by fear. Truly miraculous.

(See http://panachedesai.com/ for gatherings and webcasts with Panache Desai.)

To Do or to Be?

Recently, a friend and I were talking about how to handle the polarity between doing and being that many of us carry inside of us. We’ve been raised in a culture that emphasizes effort, trying, achievement, and success in material terms. The work ethic and the drive to constantly do pervade our society. On the job, unpaid overtime has become routine, and low-paying positions often force people to work at two jobs to make ends meet. Multi-tasking, email, and social media fill up all our “free” time, and friends and family are seen on the fly.

Even outside of mainstream culture, among those who are seeking to change the status quo to something more humane and truly livable, there is a certain push to be active, busy, involved in something. During the current period of major Earth changes, people’s experience of accelerating time also contributes to the frenetic need to keep moving—just to keep up with the hours that are rushing by!

Yet cracks in this compulsive busyness are appearing—possibly because we have run ourselves to the wall with the 24/7 modality. People are turning to things like meditation and yoga because they are quite literally burned out. Often their bodies stop them before their minds do. Headaches, injuries, and dis-ease of all kinds pop up in our lives to show us that all is not well. We are forced to slow down and find a way back to health. When we stop filling our lives with events and activities and instead focus on self-healing, doing takes a backseat to being and allowing.

Regular meditation or yoga practice helps individuals make this mental shift. The breath is of prime importance in both. Students learn to allow the breath to flow in and out without effort, without holding. In some traditions, they learn to watch the breath and just be in the quiet inner stillness. Eventually, with practice, people learn to carry that letting go to their daily lives, allowing events and emotions to pass through them without judgment or clutching, just as the breath does. Doing in this context arises from the quiet, centered space of being, not from polarized trying or effort.

The key, of course, is reaching that balance in a world that is skewed to emphasize just the opposite. But that’s why we’re here. The world is evolving, and we are evolving. We’re living the transition, learning how to embody the new human BE-ing, how to be conscious spirit in physical form, effortlessly flowing with the energy of life.