What Does Unconditional Love Really Mean?

Photograph © 2018 Peggy Kornegger
We hear the term unconditional love a lot these days, especially in spiritual circles. But what does it mean exactly? At first glance, it seems to mean loving without conditions. Yes, it is that. Yet it is more than that. As I live my life, I begin to see other levels to it. Something that involves seeing clearly someone’s human vulnerabilities and seeming faults as well as their divinely sweet magnificence–and loving them for all of that. Holding it all in my heart at the same time, seeing it as part of this particular individual’s soul journey. And seeing myself that way too. I’ve found that viewing everything as perfectly lovable in just one other person unlocks the ability to do the same for everyone in my life—and then for everyone on the planet.

That is why we are here, to do just that. Our greatest challenge and our greatest gift is to love and be loved in return—unconditionally. When we do so, we form a sweet circle of reciprocity that lifts everything on the planet to a higher vibration. Vibration is the key, because everything in the cosmos is energy. When we up-shift the energy within us, the world reflects back to us a higher vibration. And love is the highest vibration of all. It dissolves the fear or negativity that may be keeping you (and everyone around you) stuck in one place. Love yourself, love another, love everyone—no holds barred. That’s the sequence of unconditionality. That’s the global shift we are now a part of.

I recently felt this happen within me quite powerfully with someone I have known for years. I thought that I already loved them unconditionally, but I found that I still held certain life-path desires for them. When I suddenly became aware of this, and then consciously and intentionally released those expectations, I felt my heart open wider as I surrendered everything to God’s greater wisdom. Even the most well-meaning wishes for someone else’s life can be an unconscious limitation for them, as well as a limitation on love itself. Because unconditional love is not about the depth or strength of the love but rather it is total allowing, complete acceptance. Compassion. Within that framework, it doesn’t matter what someone does or doesn’t do on their life journey; you still love them completely.

This is soul-level love. This is the way God or the Divine Mother loves. The mind doesn’t enter into it at all. This love is pure heart, pure soul. A sacred open embrace. And this is the unconditional love that the new Planet Earth is moving into. The hatred, judgment, fear of difference, self-loathing, abuse, and violence that we thought was the only reality are gradually crumbling as the light of unconditional love shines fully on them. When our shadow side is spotlighted, we see the truth of who we are behind the shadow. That truth is unconditional love: the shining diamond at the core of our being. We were born with it, and now it can be fully seen and experienced as the shadow falls away.

Our so-called “flaws” make us sparkle even more. We are beautiful in our humanity and our divinity, and when each of us can see the full spectrum of beauty in everyone we meet, there will no longer be a distinction between Heaven and Earth. That is oneness; that is unconditional love.

 

Accentuate the Positive, My Mother’s Gift

Photograph © 2018 Peggy Kornegger
A song written and recorded in 1944 that was popular with my parents’ generation had the refrain: “Accentuate the positive; eliminate the negative.” Those who lived through the Great Depression and World War II often developed one of two responses to life: fear or hope, or perhaps a mix of both. You can see hope in songs like this one. And I definitely saw it in my mother when I was growing up in the 1950s and 1960s. Without fail, she always looked for the positive in any situation, person, or event. If someone behaved in an unpleasant manner, my mother’s response was inevitably, “She means well.” And then she would find something nice to say about the person.

She looked for the good in the world around her on a daily basis—the beauty of the sky, birdsong in the backyard, music and poetry, my dad’s sense of humor. She framed life this way. It wasn’t just a coping mechanism for the times; it arose from deep in her soul. I came to realize this fully later in her life when she was hospitalized and had to have a serious operation. I flew to my Illinois hometown from San Francisco, where I lived at the time. I sat by her side for three days and nights, our hands inseparably clasped in a lifetime of mother-daughter love. I watched her face, pale and drawn with pain, light up when she turned and looked at me: “You’re always there,” she whispered.

And I watched her eyes scan a basically ugly hospital room and finally light on the one thing she could honestly see beauty in: “Isn’t that a lovely walnut door?” That was the essence of my mother. That was who she was at the deepest level, beyond pain, beyond medication, beyond hospitals. From her soul, in every waking moment of her life, she looked around to find beauty—and she always found it. This was her legacy to me; I carry that positivity in my genes. I carry the memory of her waking me each morning with “Good morning, merry sunshine” and then at breakfast: “Another beautiful day!” From the beginning of my life, I was imprinted with that ability to love life fully under any circumstance.

My mother didn’t live a life free of all pain and difficulty; like all of us, she faced challenges. But she lived a life of appreciation and gratitude for the moments of love, beauty, and connection that are always present if we but open our eyes (and hearts) to see them. My mother lived with an open heart. She found happiness in loving the people and the world around her. At this time of great change and great challenge on the planet, I look to her wisdom to sustain me and uplift me through the rest of my life. I know I was born for a reason, and I know she was my mother for a reason. There is an ancestral line of positive energy that runs through our lives. She passed it on to me to sustain me—and as a reminder, so that I never forget that we all have positive energy within us.

We are each alive at this key transformational juncture in world history to remind each other of that. No matter what disturbing events in the external world show up each day, we still carry hope in our hearts and souls. We can listen to the voices that say “We shall overcome” and “All you need is love” instead of those that speak separation and hatred into the world. Whatever is occurring now is part of our evolution, as a species, as a planet, as a universe. We are not done yet. There is always, always possibility and positivity within us. We can breathe that into the world in all that we say and do. And that becomes our legacy of love…

 

Living Love 24/7—Open the Door to a New Dimension

What would it be like to feel love in every moment, to live your life from that place? Is it possible? I believe it is. In this week’s video blog, I talk about how a new dimension can open up to us when we center our hearts and minds in loving the people and the world around us. When you see possibilities instead of problems, everything begins to unfold in expansive and magical ways.

Your Compassionate Heart

Photograph © 2018 Peggy Kornegger
You have one. We all do. It just gets covered over with a protective shell of fear about your own survival. Or it is buried and forgotten in a busy and sometimes frantic daily life. We get lost in our own worries and concerns and forget about the others we share the world with. We lose sight of the fact that everyone else around us is living lives very similar to our own at the most basic level, beginning with birth and ending with death. Yet isn’t life about more than that really? Aren’t we greater than the events of our lives? Isn’t there a thread that ties us together, in spite of our differences?

That thread is compassion. We were born with a compassionate heart, and it is repeatedly awakened whenever we experience someone else’s pain or joy as our own. Today, on this planet, there is a quiet but universal awakening occurring in which we are finding the compassion deep in our hearts. At times of crisis or catastrophe, the shell of self-protection breaks open, and we feel deeply for our fellow human beings, often giving money, food, clothing, or whatever is needed to help. We feel that way too when we share in someone else’s happiness or good fortune. Our compassionate heart is always ready to shine its light of love outward. It’s a natural part of being a human soul in physical form. That’s why we are here, really: to become aware of our individual separateness as an illusion, and oneness as the greater truth.

Selfishness and lack of compassion are habits. Ones we learn from a very early age in this culture. We are frequently taught that when someone else wins, we lose, and that “on top” is the best place to be. In spite of countless spiritual or religious teachings about love and sharing with others, the overriding voice of this society insists “look out for yourself” and “don’t let anyone else take advantage of you.” It becomes a habitual trigger response to the world, and you lose your connection to that thread of compassion that ties you to other beings on this planet. And to your self as well. Because if you don’t love and have compassion for yourself, you are incapable of having it for others.

The key to stepping out of your conditioning and awakening compassion is patience, with others and with yourself: patience as a daily practice that is cultivated with each conscious breath you take. This opens the door to peaceful loving relationships in all parts of your life. It may take time to reverse the collective trend toward mistrust and separation, but it is possible if we are patient and committed. The kind and gentle child who lives within us is just waiting for acknowledgment and encouragement. Each time one of us is generous or caring in word or deed to another on this planet, we are shifting the energy for all of us. In that shift, the silent message is: “You are not alone.”

Compassion is the reason you were born: love creates life. Divine love and compassion created the universe and lives in your very cells. When we open to the compassion within us, we find the true meaning of life. It’s not about money or fame or accumulating possessions, as we are so often told. It’s about sharing love with others. It’s about generosity of spirit. Caring for self and others with equal gentleness and understanding. Compassion is a circle really. And we are all part of it, at the deepest level. The love you give returns to you and fills your compassionate heart with joy, overflowing into greater and greater expressions of love in the world.

 

You Are Perfect Now

Photograph © 2018 Peggy Kornegger
Perfection is not something beyond you. Something out there, to reach for and aspire to. It’s right here, right now. This is a small gem of wisdom that I sometimes forget. Small but it is at the core of all that is. There are no flaws in God’s universe (or in you within that universe). Everything is part of a seamless, intricately interwoven tapestry of divine creation. When I fully embrace this truth, I can let go of striving, comparing, and dissatisfaction. I can live with appreciation and gratitude in every moment for the perfection everywhere. I may not know the “why,” but I can trust in the reasonless reason for all Being.

This morning before dawn, I sat on the sofa of our new home in Florida and cried as I remembered my garden in Massachusetts. I ached inside at the memory of my colorful flowers and the butterflies and bees who visited them. There, I was part of the seasonal flow of nature. The robins called to me if I didn’t fill the birdbath early enough each summer morning. The squirrels and rabbits occasionally sat near me as I worked quietly in the yard. The hummingbirds darted rapidly from the bright-red cardinal flowers to the native honeysuckle. The goldfinches balanced atop the purple coneflowers as they ate the seeds in autumn. I missed them all.

Yet I knew it had been time to leave. The house was sold, neighbors were moving, and Florida was calling. It was all perfect. Today, that perfection met me when I went for a walk after my predawn cry. The immense stunningly white clouds against the intensely blue sky stopped me in my tracks. The skies are always breathtaking in Florida. At all times of the day I am in awe at the color and light. And then there are the tropical flowers and birds right outside my door: hibiscus, plumeria; ibis, egret, heron. I love my new home, even when I miss my Massachusetts garden.

At times I think I should always be upbeat and smiling. Centered in my inner God wisdom and flowing along life’s path in complete synchronicity with every experience. The crazy truth is that I am synchronized, whether I’m crying or laughing. Perfection is not the exclusion of certain feelings; it’s the inclusion of all of them. There is absolutely nothing that is not the way it should be in my life, and yours. Our human design is so tightly constructed that every part is essential. If any of it was missing, we would not be who we were created to be, and there would be a hole in the fabric of the universe. Everything is unfolding as it’s meant to, for the greater evolution of life.

In essence, none of us is flawed and nothing is wrong with us; we are perfect just the way we are, here on this planet to live an experience that is uniquely ours. God experiences life on Earth through us, and the universe expands through God’s own loving expansion (and ours). The entire cosmos is a finely tuned and orchestrated symphonic work of genius in which nothing is off-key or discordant. This is the “music of the spheres,” which spiritual seekers have sometimes heard on their journeys beyond the individual egoic self.

From this perspective, all is well, and if I accept whatever presents itself in my life moment to moment, with love in my heart, I tap into a deeper awareness and clearer vision which guides me through my life without suffering or judgment (of self or others). No mistakes have been made. The Divine is an all-encompassing energy that moves the universe beyond time and space or human questioning. What exists in your life and mine, and in the world’s, exists for a reason that is not necessarily logical or even intuitive. It just is. This is absolute Being, of which we are an inseparable part. Thus, everything we do arises from the evolutionary potential of the universe. We live and die, we grow and evolve, because we are Being itself, eternally expanding into new levels of beingness.

Sound wacky? Abstract? A little frightening? Only on the surface. At the deepest level, beyond whatever you or I may feel/think individually, this is our collective global direction now at this key time. In the midst of all the extremes of our lives, we are coming into full conscious awareness of exactly who we are and why we are here. We are God, living out infinite variations of the love that created the universe. The more clearly I see that, the more I can relax and just live my life, one perfect moment at a time. So can you.