Tag: light

Amma’s Hug

Photograph © 2016 Peggy Kornegger
Photograph © 2016 Peggy Kornegger
For years I’ve wanted to see Amma, the “hugging saint,” considered to be an embodiment of the Divine Mother. Her appearances in the Boston area, however, have conflicted with Panache Desai’s summer programs at Omega Institute, so I’ve always chosen to go there instead. Ironically, it was Panache who recently provided me with the opportunity to see Amma in person. So often, life’s completely unanticipated events are filled with more magic than anything we could have planned. Therein lies a tale….

In early July, I flew to Washington DC for an Initiation weekend with Panache, which included a vibrational activation connecting participants to their essential divine self and life purpose. Those of us in attendance found ourselves immersed in profound divine connection and soul awareness, an experience that seems to expand exponentially at every one of his events. Within the larger group of 70, there were about 18 of us who have been taking part in an ongoing accelerated program (OAP) with him. On Saturday evening, after the Initiation finished for the day, Panache asked our OAP group if we would like to see Amma, whose weekend events were taking place not far from ours. And the adventure began.

Arriving in several cars, we gathered outside the main hall where the Atma Puja ceremony for world peace was soon to begin. Mind you, people arrive hours early for Amma’s events in order to get a seat and also to stand in line to receive a token that will allow them to stand in line again to receive a hug and blessing (darshan) from her. The hall was already filled to capacity, and we were redirected to the overflow hall, where the main-hall events could be seen on a large screen. We sat in one long row holding hands as the ceremony began. In both halls, hundreds of voices chanting in Sanskrit filled the air. I felt as if I were hearing all of India, all of humanity, calling for peace in those ancient sacred sounds that reverberated in my heart. Afterward, small cups of water blessed by Amma were passed out to everyone, and she herself spoke to the gathering, with a translator. More chanting, and then the ceremony ended, lasting about an hour and a half.

At this point we were going to leave. Panache, however, had something else in mind. He led us to the front entrance to the main hall, closest to the stage. We saw him consulting with several different Amma volunteers. Apparently, the protocol is that spiritual teachers who come to see other teachers are welcomed as honored guests, as are those with them. It seemed that we were going to be given tokens so that we could join the front of the line to receive darshan. We took off our shoes in preparation. Not so fast. One of the volunteers (who evidently did not know of this protocol) said that we were not allowed to be there and should leave. After much discussion, Panache told us that we were going to leave. Shoes back on, leaving. But wait. One of Amma’s assistants came up to Panache and told him not to leave, that everything could be arranged, that we just had to wait a half hour or so.

Over the next 2–3 hours of uncertain waiting, every time we decided to leave, this sweet assistant appeared and asked Panache to please stay, that all would be arranged. As a group, we surrendered the outcome again and again—yes, no, yes, no, yes…. Finally, five us were sent with tokens to join the line. Excitement! More than five would be too many, so the rest of us were just happy to hug the other five as they came back from being hugged by Amma. Okay, time to leave. Wait, no, the assistant appeared again: “Please stay, I think I can get more tokens for you.” We stayed. More time. Maybe we should leave. Then magically, the assistant brought back enough tokens for everyone who wanted to receive darshan. Not only that but they were “fast-track” tokens with tiny red circles on them.

I was among the last group of four to go. Within minutes, I went from no to yes to then following a volunteer around the back of the small stage where Amma sat, surrounded by helpers, and immediately up onto the stage to within a few yards of her. At this point, I entered a slightly dazed state, in which I stepped forward and did everything I was directed to do by the helpers: take off glasses, kneel, move forward inch by inch. Panache was ahead of me, so I was able to see him being hugged by Amma and the expression on his face afterward: sort of, well, dazed. Then I was immediately in front of Amma, and she drew me to her in a hug and said something that sounded like “my daughter, my daughter” in my ear. Her beautiful smiling gaze rested briefly on my face afterward, and light shone from her being. She radiated light, like the sun. I turned and slowly made my way back to the others on the opposite side of the hall, a rose petal gift in my hand.

The energy of the entire evening was so powerful that it raised us to a higher vibration—we could feel it. I can’t even say how much was Amma, how much Panache (who also embodies loving divine presence), how much the Atma Puja, and how much our group, which was so cohesive, so completely joined in oneness. The gestalt of it all taken together was mind-boggling. I learned something about destiny and synchronicity that night. We kept being shown over and over that we were meant to be there, having the experience that we were having. We surrendered, together, and were carried by that surrender. Right through the whole incredible weekend and back into our lives, changed.

As I look at people now, I see reflections of that radiant light-filled energy in every single face. We are the radiance we have sought so long outside our selves. Increasingly, at this amazing time of huge shifts in human awareness, we are realizing that we too carry within us a light that shines from our souls and moves us to live openheartedly, with absolute love for all beings, everywhere. Like a saint, like a smiling hugging saint.

 

Let Your Soul Shine

Photograph © 2016 Peggy Kornegger
Photograph © 2016 Peggy Kornegger

The energy of this new year 2016 feels so powerful. I was completely flattened by it in January. And then uplifted to a new level of opening and expansion in February. To me, 2016 feels like the year when the cookie-cutter constraints of our social programming fall away, and we stand fully embodying our soul’s presence in the physical world. We emerge from the shadows of fear and uncertainty and experience the power of our own true essence. Courage and inner vision will carry us forward into a new paradigm of Being on this planet, one in which full-out soul expression is celebrated instead of stifled. Our liberated minds and bodies will support our complete creative unfolding. Now is the time for each of us, in our own special way, to play the music of the spheres for all to hear.

So sing your song, write your book, share your vision, dance your unique soul self into unlimited being. Give yourself over to everything that is longing to be expressed through you. This is your life—claim it. Live it to the farthest edges of possibility. Together, we are shedding old externally imposed self-images and stepping into a new world of infinite expansion at the soul level. The old separations between body, mind, and spirit are dissolving. The deepest truth is that every part of you is sacred and filled with light. The curtain of illusion is falling away, and we see clearly who we are: eternal divine beings in human form. Shining, sparkling, embracing ourselves and one another with love and gratitude.

Faced with the world’s uncertainty and fear, we choose to walk bravely into the unknown, trusting in something greater that is carrying us forward into the flowering of our inner spirit. Let it happen. Don’t hold anything back. This very moment in eternal time is your moment, our moment. It’s why we were created and why we are here on this planet at this particular miraculous time of transformation. Let go completely of everything that has come before. It is a new planet, a new paradigm, and nothing is as it was….because we have changed. We are allowing the powerful energy flowing through us to completely shift our lives.

With each breath we take, we are blessed with a new beginning, a rebirth. May our collective breaths bring us all together in the deeper realization that we have always been one, and separateness and the judgments that accompanied it were just illusions. Within oneness, within the unbroken stream of light that is cosmic consciousness, there is no “other.” There is only love, infinite and unique manifestations of love. May we see that so clearly that we never forget again. May this be the year that we look into one another’s eyes and see stars of infinite magnitude—the reflection of our own shared brilliance.

So let the light of your soul shine. Let your spirit flower. Let nothing stand between you and your inner magnificence. It is the time of sweet awakening, of the full remembrance of who we are. In our hearts and souls, we always knew this day would come….

 

Good Vibrations

Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger
Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger
No, not the song—we’ve moved beyond the Beach Boys now. It’s not about “good vibes” in the 1960s sense. Vibration today has taken on a much more expansive meaning. As the collective consciousness evolves, more and more individuals are recognizing vibration, or energy, as the basis of everything in the universe, including people. This “truth” comes from modern science as well as ancient spiritual traditions. We humans are high-vibration light beings at the level of spirit, slowed down to inhabit denser physical forms. As our spiritual awareness expands, we become more luminous and free. We are stepping away from density and into being conscious spirit in physical bodies. As we do so, we begin to experience our own soul’s vibration, as well as those of others.

I first became aware of my own vibration at a global gathering with Panache Desai in 2011. He was guiding us in a deep meditation, and after a time, my sense of my physical body faded, and what I experienced was an almost electric pulsing at my center, near my solar plexus—a vibration so strong that it radiated out through my entire being. And the feeling accompanying it was a profound peace that I didn’t want to come back from. I lay there for a long time, just floating in that space. My only conscious thought was that I was experiencing my soul, a vibrating essence that had preceded my physical body and would continue after its death. An extremely powerful experience, unlike any I had ever had. It changed everything for me in ways I can’t even describe. Put simply, my experience allowed me to see that the physical world was only the surface manifestation of a much deeper and limitless “reality”—one made up of vibration.

As I continued to take part in programs and sessions with Panache, I had further experiences of my own inner vibration, as well as a growing recognition of that core essence in others. My sense is that when two people connect at the soul level, they begin to vibrate in tandem with one another, feeling one another’s essence at the level of pure vibrating energy. Panache holds this space for everyone he comes in contact with. He is like a tuning fork, accelerating people into a higher vibrational resonance through the powerful energetic frequency he embodies: unconditional love. I believe this is where we are all headed. That is why we are here on Earth at this key transitional time: to vibrate our soul’s loving light in the world.

We are each becoming embodiments of love energy, and that love vibrates out from us to all those whose paths cross ours. Our open hearts open the hearts of others, without a word being spoken. This is what the Great Shift in Consciousness is all about. Consciousness—which is everywhere, which is shared—opens into its greater unlimited being when it is touched by love. Narrow perceptions fall away, and we are One, beyond thought and individuation. In the presence of pure love, people become that love and begin to shine it from their own hearts.

Each day now, I feel the light within me more, and I see it shining out from others. Love, the highest vibration there is, is transforming the planet from hard rock to golden light. We are each becoming luminous energy fields, vibrating light and love, and awakening others to the beauty of their own inner vibration. One by one, many by many, everything and everyone will shift. Our little blue planet will become a golden shining vibrating star. This is the true meaning of “good vibrations.”

Spring Forward: Defrosting in Boston

Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger
Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger

Spring is officially here, but in the Boston area, we are still defrosting. After a record-breaking winter of more than nine feet of snow (most within a month’s time), coupled with bone-chilling temperatures, we can hardly believe that the frozen tundra outside our doors has finally disappeared. This winter has been a lesson in accepting everything, especially Mother Nature’s unpredictable extremes. Again and again in life, we are called to navigate unexpected blizzards and ice storms—inner and outer, human and environmental. The seasonal weather variations teach us to let go of expectation and just live with what is. If we struggle, we suffer. If we learn to face each moment with acceptance, we can live in peace and equanimity.

In addition, each season serves a purpose. In winter, the weather can shut everything down, and we are often forced to stay inside. Sometimes inactivity, the restorative pause, is necessary. In fact, it always is. (Animals hibernate; perennials die to the ground.) It doesn’t always feel good or “right” to us. We think we should be doing something, anything, to move forward, progress. Yet non-doing is crucial to nature’s, and our, cycles of life. The slowing down and dying away in autumn and winter allow for the rebirth and resurgence in spring. In the midst of the expansiveness and warmth of summer, we forget that those days of growth and flowering occur because of the days of rest and restoration that winter insists all living beings observe.

That includes humans. Within the stillness and solitude of a heavy all-day snowfall, with work cancelled, we can find a kind of inner peace as we gaze at the falling snow from our windows. Later, of course, we have to shovel that snow! But afterward we can drink hot chocolate and rest again for a while. Winter moderates our activities for us. If we resent the orchestration, we spend the winter angry and cold. If we allow for nature’s wild variations and interruptions, we are less stressed and can look forward to spring with a rested outlook.

Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger
Photograph © 2015 Peggy Kornegger

This past winter has been a real challenge for me. My soul knows the wisdom of cycles of rest and renewal, but my mind forgets at times during the seemingly endless months of icy cold and early darkness. As the days gradually lengthen and the light fills my consciousness each morning, I feel my physical body reaching out to spring, yearning for warm air, green trees, and blooming flowers. And when they finally appear, I am filled with such intense gratitude—especially this year! The colors seem extraordinarily vibrant, almost unreal, after so many days of winter grays and whites. Perhaps this is another gift that the change of seasons brings: deep appreciation for the beauty of rebirth in nature.

We live on a planet of polarities. Even the warmer climates have their own seasonal changes. When I lived in California, winter brought weeks of rain. Now, of course, the people there are living with a severe drought. The extremes of life on Earth are part of the experience of being alive. We came here for this roller coaster ride. If everything were always the same, we would not be stimulated to grow and evolve as human be-ings–or to dig deep and find the blessing and miracle in every single remarkable moment we are alive.

 

Married!

Photograph © 2014 Helen Morse
Photograph © 2014 Helen Morse
On June 22, almost exactly one year after the defeat of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), my partner Anne and I were married in a small ceremony in Cambridge, Massachusetts. In so doing, we became part of a tidal wave of ongoing historic change in the United States. May and June, in particular, are significant months for the gay/lesbian community. On June 28, 1969, demonstrators spontaneously took to the streets and fought back against a police raid at the Stonewall Inn in New York City. Stonewall became the pivotal rallying focus for the beginning of the gay rights movement in the U.S. A year later, on June 28, 1970, the first annual Gay Pride marches took place in New York and other cities, spreading around the world in the decades since then. In May of 2004, Massachusetts became the first state to allow legal marriages of same-sex couples. Ten years later, here we are, a married couple, after 31 years together.

People often wonder why we waited ten years. Well, primarily because of the tax complications—we would have had to file differently for state and federal since only one recognized same-sex marriage until DOMA was struck down. Also, marriage had never really been on our radar. It wasn’t something that mattered to us, and we had never thought about it as remotely possible. Over the years, we watched state after state and then the federal government pass acts and laws banning same-sex marriage. We both attended national marches on Washington for gay/lesbian/bi equal rights in 1987 and 1993. Finally, unbelievably, the tide began to turn, thanks to the activism of groups like GLAD, as well as countless courageous individuals, well-known and unknown, who came out in their lives and helped to shift public consciousness. In 2004, marriage became an option for those of us in same-sex relationships in Massachusetts.

As Anne and I attended the weddings of gay and lesbian friends, we were deeply moved by the open-hearted love, sharing, and support that took place. We began to consider the possibility of marrying, not so much for legal reasons but for sentimental ones—to share our love with friends and family. We didn’t want to come to the end of our lives and regret not having experienced something so special and really quite sacred. We also wanted to be part of the amazing, expansive energy that was transforming the world around us. So in January of this year, we decided to get married.

Photograph © 2014 Helen Morse
Photograph © 2014 Helen Morse

Almost immediately, magic began to stream into our lives. Our dear friend Ji Hyang,who had just moved to California, told us she could fly in and marry us on June 22. Mount Auburn Cemetery, a beloved nearby nature sanctuary, was available for an outdoor wedding ceremony on that date. From California, Nevada, Illinois, Washington, DC, New York, and Massachusetts, friends and family told us that they “wouldn’t miss” being there. So many people offered to help with the wedding and backyard reception that we were moved to tears of gratitude again and again by the generosity and genuine happiness everyone expressed. Even the two clerks at our town hall were excited and welcoming when we applied for our marriage license. They took our picture and sent us off for celebratory ice cream.

So, on the day after the summer solstice, Anne and I awoke to a morning of the most perfect weather imaginable. Blues skies and lush green foliage framed Auburn Lake, where the ceremony took place. Friends who hadn’t seen each other in decades came together in joyful reunion to celebrate our wedding. The ceremony we had created played out in the most wondrous of ways: flute, guitar, songs, poetry, metta (loving kindness), reflections, and vows flowed seamlessly into an exquisite tapestry of love and light. Looking out at the radiant, loving faces that surrounded us, Anne and I felt like we had been lifted to a higher vibration, our hearts overflowing with love. Every hug, every word spoken, every tear shed, was a miracle that opened up into yet another miracle. Toward the end of the ceremony, a sudden strong wind moved powerfully through the trees overhead, as if Spirit were mirroring back our feelings and blessing each and every one of us. It was a day unlike any I have experienced in my lifetime. A day of the extraordinary and the miraculous—and, as several friends told us, “the most beautiful wedding ever.”